DLTI-6; Shabbat Kodesh (holy shabbas)

Another blog entry begun with good intentions to post immediately but needing days to truly reflect and finish. So I am now back in DC as I but I really wanted to write about our first DLTI-6 holy shabbas while everything is fresh in my mind. I have decided to leave the verb tenses just as they where when I wrote each section of this post and I hope it won't bother you.

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Oh my gosh, it is Saturday night after an incredible havdallah and there are lots of goodbyes going on even though most of us won’t be leaving until tomorrow after lunch. Of course I realize I am ahead of myself so let me go back. Yesterday we all gathered before the sun set, most of us dressed in white, at the main building to light candles. That is me and my room mate in the photo above. There were several trays of tea lights on a table and we moved up in little waves to take turns lighting and saying the b’racha. After we headed over to the synagogue to begin kabbalat Shabbat which was led by Reb Marcia, Reb Shawn, Hazzan Jack and a woman named Ronit.

When I tell you there was lots of music and dancing for kabbalat Shabbat I have to add that the singing is extra special. Normally when you pick a tune to sing chances are some people will know it and some will learn it and some won't do either. Here people either know the tunes or are enthusiastic to try and learn because of course it is a select group. There are also many students with fine singing voices which is another plus. The sound wraps around and over and even goes through you. Occasionally we move from loudly spiritual to just loud however it is coming from a soul full place. By the way since it was Shabbat I couldn’t take photos so instead I decided to put photos here that were taken this week. Many of them are of our meals and the book, siddur or chumash I was reading at the time. I hope you will enjoy looking at the meal photos as much as I enjoyed the holy eating!

Forgot to mention about the eruv here at Isabella Freedman. In case you don’t know about an eruv, it is an enclosure around a home or community. It enables the carrying of objects out of doors for Jews on shabbat that would otherwise be forbidden by Torah law. Without an eruv, Torah-observant Jews would be unable to carry things in their pockets making it difficult for many to leave home. In public areas where it is impractical to put up walls, doorways are made out of rope and posts. It was announced at lunch that some guests may not have realized that the ropes were part of the eruv for they had put wet swimsuits on it to dry mistaking it for a clothesline. It was requested the suits come off and that no one else put clothes on the eruv. At the time of the announcement I hadn't really noticed how the eruv here was set up. Later when I took a walk I could see why some would take it for a clothesline.

The services, both daily and shabbat, whether led by DLTI students or by our holy teachers are open to anyone who is attending the center. At kabbalat shabbat I found myself looking around at the faces of some non-DLTI people in the synagogue and wondered how they were finding it. I thought most of the kabbalat service was fairly traditional and comfortable. After having spent years praying from various siddurim I now use a small hand sized Artscroll Interlinear. It has the English directly underneath the Hebrew, going in the same right to left direction and the font is bigger than the standard Artscroll. It makes it easy for me to look at the meaning of a Hebrew word I don't know plus the smallish size makes it easy to hold in my hands. When I go to services where they are using a different siddur I will hold mine and put the other one on a chair beside me in case of additions not in mine. For kabbalat Shabbat we were using the siddur that Reb Marcia has written and most everyone was using it.

After services we had a lovely dinner with wine, challah and chicken. The place was packed and the ruach was high. We were so excited I think because of our intense week together and after birkat hamazon some headed for the couches to continue talking while others, like myself headed off a wonderful sleep. In the morning I had intentions to go to an early morning movement class. Instead I went over to the dock and watched the sun come up over the trees shining on the mist on the lake water. God feels so close. God is so close. In the cabins all around you know are the sleeping souls of DLTI students and others who have come to the retreat, so you aren't really alone. So peaceful. Some of the geese were sitting on the dock with me and I looked through my Kol Zimra book of chants trying to find one that was happy in the spirit for Shabbat. “Sasson v'simcha yimtza bah, todah v'kol zimra” (gladness and joy shall abide there, thanksgiving, and the sound of music) was the one I picked. I sent the sound over the lake all the way to the red yurt where the movement class was being held. it wasn’t until Reb Marcia did her d'var Torah later in the morning that I discovered this chant was the last line of today’s haftorah! Talk about a “wow” moment.

Shabbas morning prayer was glorious and my channel to the Divine was open and clear. There was no taping allowed and I am finding it hard to remember exactly what we did other than that it was Reb Marcia and Hazzan Jack that led. Ahhhh. There was only one small thing that happened that gave me any reason for regret and that was during the torah service. In case you haven't experienced Jewish Renewal aliyot one of the leaders or readers will give a summary of the part next being read and have then ask for people to come up that feel this is speaking to them. I had just assumed I would go up for one of the aliyot. After all it was our first DLTI shabbat together and the parsha was so rich. However the kavannot turned out to be so specific that I couldn't find my way into one and I didn't go up. While I felt sad about this later on one of the other students mentioned that because the kavannot had been so specific she HAD gone up. The same words were heard and yet we had two entirely different responses to them. A reminder that this reaction will be found in any congregation or group we might lead. Part of the training then, for me anyway, will be to figure out how to include as many as possible whether it be with song, silence, aliyot etc.

The weather was perfect, sunny but not too hot and with a cool breeze. We had a nice lunch and I was torn between sleeping, swimming and hiking to the overlook. I weighed over each possible choice deciding I could always sleep or swim. The eruv doesn't go that far so I went and left all of my things in my room. When I couldn't find anyone to walk with I left word with several people including my room mate where I was going just in case I had any trouble. I walked and sang going past the red yurt and onto the path into the trees. The first section of the path has moss on the ground, the second has grass and leaves and the last part is just pine needles. I climbed up and up with Aharon, Moshe and Ezekiel coming to mind. Would there be a chariot awaiting me when I stepped out into the light or a notice from Hashem that my time was up? I saw the big flat stones and as I walked out the sound of a small plane engine caught my ear and the red color of the plane caught my eye. The plane came straight towards the overlook. My body froze for what seemed like forever but was only a moment. Then the plane swooped up and to the left. The sun was hot and my view was of green pastures, roads and houses. In my hands I was holding gratitude.

I meditated for 30 minutes and then descended back into the cool woods. When I was half way down the path I saw two others on their way up. For a moment I thought of climbing back up, realized I didn't have time and continued down. Just as well since the mincha service was soon to start. It proved to be lovely. I really have enjoyed the week of student services as they tell you so much about the leader. The day had been so restful but the energy started gearing up as we first ate dinner and then went to the synagogue where Yofiyah was leading an hour of her Jewish kirtan chants. If you aren't familiar with her music you can search for it on the web. Kirtan is devotional call and response chants. A friend took me to see Yofiyah in DC several years ago and not only did I buy an album but began using her "Oseh Shalom" chant in my Tot Shabbat services. Yofiyah and another girl sang while others including Jack played instruments.

When she was finished students took over to lead ma'ariv and then Reb Shawn directed us back to the main lounge so we could do havdalah. Reb Marcia led this service and all of us were holding hands or hugging as we smelled the spices and held our fingers up to catch the reflection of the candle light. Shavua tov, a good week, we said to each other. When Yonatan, who works at the center, came by I whispered to him that sadly Mashiach hadn't come. He whispered back that Mashiach is always here. Did I think that Mashiach was lazy? No, it isn't that Mashiach isn't here but only that we are not yet able to see him. The lights went on and out came ice cream and toppings. Yummy and a sweet way into the new week. For those who wanted there was an open mike night and though I had some thoughts of songs that would be fun to sing for the group I choose to sit and let the moments of the week seep into my bones. Shavua tov indeed. A good week.