The month of Elul has now passed
and the new Jewish year is here. The time before a new year, a new job, or a
new week is a perfect time to reflect, to search our soul, to look back and to cleanse. How have we
strayed away from the path? What behaviors do we want to rid ourselves of? What
are the positive things we want to nurture? One Jewish tradition is to really focus on this cleansing during the month of Elul. Here is a window on my journey.
Sun and Water
My Elul cleansing this year began in the
swimming pool of a friend. I lay on my back in the waters and watched the sun
go down. Back and forth, back and forth, the waters held and supported me as I asked myself the questions
mentioned above and did a review. It felt right. It felt good. It was a beginning but I knew there was
more. It was going to be a process. My job was just to let it happen.
Moon and Death
Then a young friend died. It was unexpected and a bit shocking. I discovered death too can assist in the cleansing process. At night I looked as the moon shone white in the sky. I saw the moon as life and the blackness around it as death. While the waters had been warm this felt sharp. While the waters had enveloped me safely this was piercing and lonely. If I was to die right now what
would people say and remember about me? How was I using my gift of life? What did I need
to change?
Clouds and Mountain
I needed to go where the land would hold me. I would go up into the mountains. I walked through the forest of trees
examining their roots as well as my own. I saw turtle, deer and bear trying to decide if this too had some lesson for me. Some things seem like they can’t be
changed. Perhaps, but other times it just takes more work. As I came to this conclusion after a hike and sitting on boulders overlooking a vast plain I was promptly surrounded by a cloud, a blanket of many tiny water
droplets. Safe but still not finished.
Full Circle
Up to the mountains and now the strong pull was to go
to the ocean. In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. I once more was laying on my back in the waters only instead of chlorine the were full of salt. I realized I
had come full circle. In this place was the water, the land, the sun, the moon
and the clouds. The assistance of the elements was complete. Dolphins swimming
in the nearby waves and gulls flying overhead confirmed it was time to move on. The process wasn't over and never would be but now it was time to enter the new year. L'shanah tovah tikvatenu. Always the hope for a good year.
